My Damn Opinion

Alright, I need to get something off my chest. I am very wary of making my LJ into a big pity party, so I often don't share this kind of information. If you don't want to look at this, ( skip it. )

Maybe this is my fault. Who knows? But here's the situation I found when I came home.

I snagged my mail out of my mailbox as I was walking in, hoping to finally see my Federal Tax refund. I need that to go towards a deposit on a new place so I can get the hell out of here. I was forced to mail it because when I attempted their bullshit online tax filing, the return was rejected because they "didn't like the pin number I created for their website." Yes, that was in the message they sent me. Whatever, screw you. The CO State IRS website worked like a charm and I had my refund in something like two weeks, it was awesome. But if you all want to fuck with me like this, fine.

So I grab my mail, and I'm walking back in and I realize that I'm holding my Federal Tax Return envelope in my hand, only it's had a few additions to it. When I pulled it from the booklet, it had the address of the IRS office conveniently pre-printed on it, so all I had to do was attach some exorbitantly high postage to it, and send it away. However, I find that it's been returned to me now, and I am concerned as to why. I check the corner - still has the stamps on it. I check the other corner - addressed with my return address, otherwise they couldn't have gotten it to me.

Anyone care to guess why it was returned?

NOT DELIVERABLE AS ADDRESSED.

I don't know for sure, but I'm willing to bet that the IRS Return processing office gets more mail than any other location in the United States. I'll bet the post office handles millions and millions of those envelopes. It's the single most mailed item in the country. Those envelopes are pretty distinctive, because they're a little bigger than most, and they have the address preprinted on the front.

So now, having been robbed of my postage, I will be going to a goddamn fucking Postal counter tomorrow and I'm going to put this envelope in a Post Master's hands, and I'm going to have that person inspect it themselves and confirm that it is fit for delivery. I'm sure that will cost me several dollars, but whatever extortion I need to pay to get this shit done, I guess I'm going to have to deal with.

So, a few months ago I tried to sell some things on Ebay. I've always had pretty good luck getting rid of things this way, and helping other people get rid of things this way, and it's a good way to make some money on the side. However, after spending an afternoon creating several listings, I tried to post my auctions and was told that I could not, that my account was frozen. This was news to me, as I had been repeatedly logging in and out of my account, looking for prices and whatnot. I had even gotten some auction notices.

When I dug a little deeper, I found that my Paypal account had been frozen too. I'm fairly certain there was no money on it, I never leave more than a dollar or two, but I was not able to get a response from Paypal or Ebay as to why I had suddenly been blocked and cut off. To this day, I have never gotten a response. Frustrating, but whatever.

Then I read this. If this is accurate, and I will freely admit that I have not delved deeply into the announcements to extract every piece of data, Ebay is attempting to ruin themselves by financially screwing over everyone who keep their business running: their sellers. I encourage you to  read it yourself and come to your own conclusions. However, my conclusion is this: I am done with selling or buying on Ebay. I know that I have had those "psycho sellers" the author writes about, and I have had negative and even neutral feedback left for me unfairly. (That's right jackass, it's not MY fault the postal service wrecked your shipment. I am NOT postmaster general, and leaving me negative feedback doesn't afftect the USPS at all.)

Over the years, Ebay and Paypal have screwed me royally. Mostly Paypal, I admit. The single biggest sale I ever did on Ebay was to the tune of about $600, and the money was transferred from my Paypal account to my bank account at the time. At least, it was in theory. In reality, the money disappeared from my Paypal account and never showed in my bank account. To this day, I have gotten no response from them regarding that money. But when money donated to charity for Hurricane Katrina victims vanished from Paypal as well, I felt at least a little vindicated - they really were stealing from people. When Paypal finally bought Ebay, I knew nothing good could come of it. And now we see the results.

I will not be partaking in the strike that the author is mentioning, but not because I don't support them. It's because I am going on to Ebay and deleting my account right now. There are a plethora of other auction sites, as well as standard retailers and even local frigging stores that can provide you with the wonderful things you seek. Ebay, however, has decided that their reputation is such that they can act any way they please, and the sheep will keep coming back.

As with every other corporation that has tried this tactic, the real effect is only this: the beginning of their death spiral. Farewell.

UPDATE: Funny....the link on Ebay labeled "Close my account".....is a 404. Seriously....this is kind of childish.

UPDATE AGAIN: Okay, so after some digging and following dead links, I found the real Ebay cancel page. I walked through about five steps asking me if I wanted to cancel my account. Taking a bit of artistic license, the conversation went something like this:

D: Cancel my account.
E: We're sorry to see you leave. Are you sure you want to quit?
D: Yes.
E: Are you sure?
D: Yes.
E: Are you really sure?
D: Yes.
E: Are you really super-secret-sugar-swear-sure?
D: YES.
E: Well, you can't. Not yet. You have to wait 180 days before we will cancel your account.
D: ...Six. Months. Why do I have to wait six months to cancel an account?
E: Because you might have auctions still up. Or maybe some bids out on something.
D: Your auctions last a maximum of seven days. That does not explain the six months.
E: You might have a balance on your account.
D: I don't. I can't sell anything on your site, so I couldn't have a balance. You have computers that can tell you this. In fact, they don't need to tell you, you are the computer.
E: You still have to wait six months. Would you like to know why?
D: Yes, please.
E: Here's an email explaining that you have to wait six months.
D: I already knew that, it doesn't explain why.
E: ....
D: Hello?
E: ....
D: Hellooooo?
E: ....
D: ....
E: We're sorry to see you leave. Are you sure you want to quit?

More than ever, fuckass. More than ever.

The YouTube video, set to a hard-driving song called "Stray Bullet" by the industrial rock band KMFDM, shows a still photo of a low building that appears to be Jokela High School.

What the fuck, you crazy fucking assholes? Stay the hell away from my favorite band.

Parker's Law of Inverse Romantics: The more attractive you find a person, the greater the chances that they will have no interest in you.

Discuss, and give examples to support your data.

So, in what seems to be becoming a summer tradition, my car died on the way to work today. I got to I-70 and Pecos, and it just cut off right on the highway. It had been overheating a bit, and the fluid reservoir had been dumping itself each time I drove. But this time, the reservoir was full to the top, and the car just stopped. Probably (hopefully) a safety cutoff switch killed it before the engine was damaged. We'll see, it is a Ford.

I ditched it off 38th & Pecos, and it took me two hours to walk home. Fortunately, it wasn't too cold once the sun got going. With luck, I'll drag the car home, put in a new water pump, and things will get back to normal. In the meantime, I'm back to busing and walking. Which isn't so bad, really. Last summer sucked, but in the end it turned out to be a generally positive experience. I even lost about 20 pounds, although I gained them all back. We'll see what I can achieve this summer.

The thing that sucks the most right now is the money situation. I'm going to borrow bus money to get out to donate plasma today, and then wilder_hiryu and his loverly wife have some bus coupons for me. I couldn't call in to work when I broke down because I couldn't pay my phone bill this month. I got a new roomie, one of the guys in our D&D group. Being Mexican, he has to wait four weeks before getting work. He's already got work lined up for when he's able to legally start working, but he intends to become a citizen, and he's not going to do anything to screw that up, like getting busted working before he's allowed. He came up from Mexico with some money, and his family sent him the rest. The problem is, his brother intercepted that money and won't give it to him. E's been eating a bowl of rice a day, and I've been giving him whatever spare food I can, but I blew most of my last paycheck covering his share of the rent, because his brother won't pay him what he owes him. So now the phone's cut off, the car is dead, and I'm having to scrape together pennies to ride the damn bus.

I get paid Friday, but most of that has to go to paying off Liz & Terry, which was the whole reason I took E on as a roommate in the first place. I don't know if they'll tolerate me spending the money that was supposed to go to them on my car. They have WAY bigger problems and debts than I ever have, what with having three kids and the associated medical bills. And of course, my monthly death threat from Xcel energy is due soon. So this will be a week/month of kicking as hard as I can to keep my head above water.

We'll see what happens. Every day is an adventure.

EDIT: I should've known. I should've seen Her hand in this.

wilder_hiryu took extra time off of work to come and drive my ass to the clinic so I could donate plasma, thus generating the money that will let me survive this week. We get to the clinic, and my pulse is mysteriously too high. Only by 2-3 points, but the computer will not allow anything but it's exact set parameters. It was mysteriously too high three times in a row, after which they tell me to go home.

I have no way to get home. Thankfully E decided to accompany me to the clinic, so we used his remaining 50 cents to call Alex and tell him to meet us on Havana after work. And then we start walking.

I know this game. I've run this routine with You before. And You didn't win last time.

Do Your worst.

EDIT: I'm feeling better now. I'm not going to kill anyone anymore, but I stand by everything else I said.

Gentlemen, here is our plan: we will create....a cell phone company!

*lightning & thunder*

Through this company, we will offer inexpensive cell phones & service to those with poor credit because of thier high medical bills. This offer will be very tempting to these poor souls....

Now envision this: The phone service costs $50 a month. A paltry sum. The service can only be paid at an automated kiosk, in our stores. Our poor victim comes in, prepared to pay for his service. He knows he has $20 in credit on his account. We will freely offer this information on the internet! He goes in with $30, prepared to pay his bill so the job applications he has put across the internet can yield fruit. When he puts the money into the machine, however, he is informed that the machine cannot accept payments of less than $50 even! No coins can be used, and even better - the machine will only accept $20 bills! 

MWA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

Note to self: make sure that store manager will have to physically open the machine to return the vict...er, customer's money to him. Oh, and make sure the same manager cannot accept a payment at his computer - that would foil our plans. We may end up hiring someone helpful, who would attempt to do everything he can to help our target.

*evil chuckle*

So...

Got a new cell phone. Couldn't get it set up - thier automatic cell-phone setup said to call customer service. Called customer service, they took me through the same dial-in setup process that had told me to call them. Actually held the phone up to the other phone so they could hear the computer voice say that. They put me on hold, and then booted me back to the automatic menu to start all over again. They did this twice. 

Took the phone to the Verizon store, 30 minutes before they close. The wonderful lady behind the tech support desk there called customer service, and customer service called thier tech support. We all spent an hour on hod with each other, and finally customer service said that the recording from thier tech support said they were now closed. The very nice lady asked me to come back the next day. 

I come back the next day. The manager looks up my account, cracks open the phone and says "Oh, the serial number on the phone has two digits reversed in the system. I'll just fix that. " Phone set up great. 

But by this time, the battery was dead. Gonna buy a new charger today. 

My new best friend fallenairmen came out Sunday and lent his mighty expertise to getting my starter back into my car. If not for him, I'd still be sweating & grunting by the side of the road, trying to get the wrong bolt off the car. Car started like a dream with the new starter in it, and I drove to work yesterday. 

Last night, on the way out to see annoyed_person, the car vented it's entire stash of power steering fluid across the engine, creating some impressive smoke effects. However, I filled it back up and made my way across town. This morning, all the fluid basically fell out of the engine, and the hole or damage or whatever is big enough that I went through 3 bottles of fluid (and some leak sealant) just getting to work. 

And Xcel energy wants $350 today or they cut off the power. 

Anybody wanna buy a kidney? ^_^

Dear Lady,

What the fuck is going on? Why is all this shit happening? What the fuck is all this about?

Why have you got me working in a horrible, horrible, horrible job that makes me want to die? I asked you for the job that was best for me, and now I'd rather kill myself than go back to work tomorrow.

Why do I have to fight so god-damned hard to get a new cell phone, and then the phone company doesn't acknowledge that I have an account with them? I could have a chance at a new job, possibly two new jobs, if I only had a cell phone that worked.

Why do you give me all the tools I need to fix my car, but create situations that make it impossible for me to get it fixed? I now have the parts I need, and the great tools. Why is my neighbor's vicious pit bull roaming the neighborhood freely, making it impossible to get underneath the car & work on it?

Seriously - what's the plan? Who's higher purpose is served by this? What the fuck am I supposed to learn? That you're bigger, meaner & smarter than me? Great, thanks. Real playground of you.

I'm on the verge of quitting here, Lady. I need some goddamn help from you, now.

Your friend,

Dan

My car died a couple of weeks ago. I've been waiting until I got paid to try & fix it. Until then, I've been taking the bus and begging rides from people like wilder_hiryu, who I have the great fortune of working with.

I'm not sure exactly what's wrong with the car, it might just be the starter. Then again, it might be something else. It's impossible to know until I try the very expensive Car Guessing Game, where you spend money to replace parts and hope you get the right one. It's all academic until I get paid.

I have several Ebay auction items that need to be shipped. They really needed to be shipped last week. I haven't been able to pay my Ebay fees, because I've had a whole lot more non-selling auctions than selling auctions. My account is currently frozen for non-payment. Doesn't seem to matter - can't ship what I've sold anyway.

Yesterday, my cell phone fried itself. There's a black scorch mark & melted plastic at the bottom of it. Nothing I do will make it turn on. Don't know when or how that happened. I've had it for less than 3 months.

Today, at last, I have a paycheck. I took the fast bus home, hoping to get here in time to put the starter in and meet Jordan & Suzie for dinner; my one chance to see them & the baby before they leave the state again. My bus got to the Park-n-Ride at 6:30, right on schedule.

Every auto parts place in walking distance of my house closes at 6 pm.

...

You know, I had always hoped to carry on this journal my entire life, making witty comments and interesting insights until one day I had grown old, and had a strapping son to take over my duties. However, I am now off to Nepal, where I intend to live as a goat. Do not attempt to find me, I have carefully placed agents with standing orders to kill anyone attempting to locate the whereabouts of a goat named Curry.

I should be in Los Angeles right now. My feet should be hurting. My back should ache. My ears should be ringing.

Fuck.

I hate being told what to do. More than anything else in the entire world. I will resist it until I am literally dying of it, and beyond. I will do stupid and ignorant things, things I know are self-destructive, to avoid doing something that someone has "ordered" me to do.

In the past few years, I have seen a few of my friends change thier lives. One of them was a talented artist, and decided to quit his day job and do art full time. Only one problem: he lacked the piece of paper that says that he is what he is: a hell of an artist. For years he resisted getting this piece of paper, and his life literally disintegrated around him. Finally, he gritted his teeth and did what he'd always known he needed to do, and went to art school. His art went from good to fricking amazing, and when all was said and done, his life had come back together. He had pulled himself out of a pit that I didn't think anyone ever climbed out of, and rejoined the human race. He really made me proud.

Another friend was a decent cook. Nothing special, but he enjoyed it - he had a passion for it. When his own situation came apart, he took the opportunity to go to cooking school, and make his passion into something real. He came out a changed person, stronger inside. It almost seemed to be an overnight transformation. He's become a different person. And I've watched him when he cooks - he is a different person. He's got mojo.

I know someone else who loves to teach. Teaching is the most fulfilling thing he knows, it is truly his raison d’être, and people in the teaching industry have told him he's a gifted teacher. Only one problem: he doesn't have a piece of paper that says so.

His life is starting to fall apart. It's actually quite tolerable, and by many standards even good, but he recognizes the tell-tale signs of ignoring your destiny. It starts small, and gets bigger and bigger. He sees signs in himself of the things he used to despise and pity in his other friends, who ignored thier own gifts and fell from The Path. Some of those friends, as we mentioned, came back. Some have not.

So here's the problem: this guy is trying to convince himself that going through the college degree process is not going to be monumental torture and a collossal waste of money. So far, he's not too confident in that subject. Firstly, consider that a teaching degree is going to be 4-5 years of college, resulting in $40,000-$60,000 in debt. Next, take that and divide by the average school teacher's salary - Katie once informed me that public school teachers make minimum wage. In a good district with a union, they might make $25,000 a year. Combine these facts with the undeniable truth that the public school system was created with the sole purpose of keeping the children off the streets and thus lowering the crime rate, well...it's not an apealling picture.

Next, consider what he has seen of the college experience. He lived that way for 6 years, and it was completely fucking miserable. Combine that effect with the fact that there will little or no time for getting or holding any kind of job, what with studies and various educational crapola, and the situation's not looking brighter. The things he will have to do to survive will make the whole experience even worse.

So what are the alternatives? Not many. There are some unique methods of teaching that really, really appeal to him, and even some possibilities for getting into that field. But the results are the same either way, and success is not guaranteed. And that, truly, is the rub: what if nothing comes of this? It's happened before. He gave everything, and got nothing in return. I know he doesn't have the faith to make that leap again - the landing was too hard. He's only really started getting back up.

But here's the worst part: this guy is a stubborn asshole. You would not believe it, what an amazing dipshit he will be to avoid doing something someone else told him to do. And way, way too many people have tried to order, cajole, finagle, and even threaten him into going to school, and now he finds the idea of slow painful death more appealing than following what he wants to do.

So what now? What now?

EDIT: I'm not afraid of going to school. That's not what the problem is. I still think it'd be a collosal waste of time and money, and my situation would not change except for the addition of $60,000 of debt. The real issue is that I will not be told what to do with my life, not even by the Gods. If they think that they can torture me until I finally give in, then I will see the entire world destroyed around me before I will submit to thier bullshit. Fuck that noise. Fuck it right in the ear.

A couple of weeks ago, I got served for the very first time. What fun.

It was from my old insurance company, the one that covered me when I had my hernia surgery a year ago. I had been instructed by my doctor to ignore any bills from the hospital, after I brought one in and asked him about it. So getting this was a bit of a surprise.

After consulting with my lawyer, he informed me that I did, in fact, owe that $2000 to them - it was my deductable for the surgery. He arranged a very fair payment plan with the collections company, and I was all prepared to send them $200 a month for the next ten months. Crappy, but liveable.

Today, I contacted my bank about the fact that my debit card suddenly stopped working. I was informed that they had taken all the money in all my accounts to cover my credit card debt to them. That included all the money I had saved for E3, as well as my entire goddamn paycheck. All of it. Every penny. I was lucky I had $40 in my wallet. They also informed me that any other money that I so foolishly deposited into my account would also be taken, including (you guessed it) any money owed to other debtors.



Is that it, asshole? Is that the best you can do to me? C'mon, I still have a house to live in and food to eat! You can do better than that, fucker! My car still fucking works! I still have a goddamn job! I'm not dead yet asshole! BRING IT!